"Hello, young man. I am Wilkin Ramirez. Can I play Connect Four with you, while this photographer from our PR department takes a few pictures? What? You haven't heard of me? Pssh...what do you mean? I'm sayin'...I am a rookie, but I am kind of a hot shot, internationally known outfield stud. Who hasn't heard of Wilkin Ramirez? Ughhh. Well, since you're such a foolish little punk who doesn't know his hospital bracelet from a hole in the ground, how about I just slap a little Connect FIVE on your ass for good measure?! Yeah, how ya like me now? Hahahahahahahah. In yo' FACE!"
Yeah, that is what I think happened there when Tigers players visited the Detroit Medical Center Children's Hospital on Friday. All the kid wanted was a famous ballplayer to sit and play a game with him, and, since Wilkin Ramirez is a jerk hole, he showed this poor child what Connect Four is all about. Rather than give a sick child a morale boost, he dominated the youngster and pounded him with a Connect Five....then laughed straight in his face. What kind of monster is this?
We can easily see that by the red checkers in the box on the close side of the picture, in front of the patient, that Wilkin had the black checkers. We can also see that twice the child had three in a row and was one checker away from winning, but Wilkin chose to prevent him from winning by blocking his efforts with a black checker. It is quite obvious that diagonally there are five straight black checkers and that Wilkin is having a hearty laugh about it. Furthermore, there is also a diagonal connect four in red that Ramirez failed to inform the child that he had gotten, for a win.
Damn you, Wilkin Ramirez and your horrible treatment of sick youth around Detroit. I hope Jim Leyland cuts you on the first day of training camp. If not, come see ME about some board games. I ain't no sick kid. And I ain't no punk b*tch either.
Let this be a lesson to all you hot dog ballplayers out there. Mess with sick kids and Jay Ballz will set out to gosh darn wreck you at some Yah-Yah-Yahtzee, son.
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