Dear Cardinals fan,
When a homerun ball is hit in your direction, do not close your eyes and raise both hands far above your head, leaving your face/chest/neck/head defenseless. Jayson Werth long balls to the cranium are probably not very comfortable. Next time, let the guy in the pajama pants behind you take a crack at it. He may not know how to dress well, but he keeps his eyes open in the face of killer shots from World Champion outfielders.
PS- Stay hot.